At the beginning of our marriage, I found myself always trying to compete with Yesenia. After all, I’m a football player. Everything I do every day is based on winning and losing. But marriage cannot operate the same way. It’s not about winning or losing, it’s about winning together. We’re a team. But it took time for me to learn this.
Having Yesenia on my team is priceless. She helps me have a solid foundation to come home to. She is someone who has been with me throughout my time in the NFL. And though she isn’t in the locker room or on the field with me, she gets it. She can see things from my vantage point and is great at listening to me and talking things through with me. My wife is my rock. No matter what I’m going through — the good, the bad, the ugly — she’s there for me.
It’s important for me to take the time to fill her needs and express my support and love for her. Just as much as I need her to be my rock, she needs me to be hers. Our NFL journey is one we do together. She loves it when I’m able to include her and bring her to team functions or galas so she can meet those I talk about so often. It’s important for her to build relationships with those in our organization so she has community as well.
When we see marriages in the league that are struggling or falling apart, we try to jump in and intervene in any way we can. But any time you don’t have consistent communication with your spouse, you’re going to be in trouble. Yesenia and I are constantly talking about what we believe, how we want to do married life, how to parent, and things like how much we are able to entertain visitors or host families from out of town. You have to sit down with your partner and have a plan. You need to set boundaries in order to protect your time together and your family.
I don’t want to know what marriage would be like without Christ in both of our lives. Doing life together with Christ at the center of it has been such a cool journey for my wife and I. We always have something to fall back on. Our faith in Jesus is everything to us. Because we are on the same page with this, we know we’ll always be on the same path. Whatever the situation is around us, we will go to God’s Word and be in agreement to do what it says. Ultimately, He is our rock.
— Trey Burton, Chicago Bears tight end
Trey Burton is a regular contributor to The Increase, providing articles and opinions. Check out Trey’s Increase profile here: https://theincrease.com/author/trey-burton/
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