Honest Before God - Janie Reed

Regardless of what season I’m in, I’m always in the Psalms. Psalm 121 has always been one of my favorite passages in the Bible to go back to:

“I lift up my eyes to the mountains —
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of Heaven and earth.
He will not let your foot slip —
He who watches over you will not slumber;
indeed, He who watches over Israel
will neither slumber nor sleep.
The Lord watches over you —
the Lord is your shade at your right hand;
the sun will not harm you by day,
nor the moon by night.
The Lord will keep you from all harm —
He will watch over your life;
the Lord will watch over your coming and going
both now and forevermore.” — Psalm 121

Growing up, I can remember singing a worship song that followed the verses of this psalm. Personally for me, I can easily forget where my help comes from. I start to think that my help comes from my work ethic, my coaches, my parents or my husband. All these things are good, but if these are the ultimate places I’m seeking help, I will be disappointed. I start to feel helpless. Reading this psalm reminds me of the fact that my help comes from the Lord, the Maker of Heaven and earth. We should never elevate human answers above God’s. 

There was a time in my life when my faith really became real to me. In the few months that followed my life-changing surrender moment, I felt like I had all the answers. I thought I’d never struggle again. But when the next big speed bump hit, I wasn’t prepared for it. Being a person who loves things to look nice (I highly value nice handwriting), I remember taking a sharpie across my journal and making it UGLY. I was being raw and transparent with God. I had fallen into the trap of thinking that I knew the truth and therefore I’d never struggle with lies or feelings of unworthiness again. 

My expectations were unrealistic; I had to give myself permission to not be OK. Because God had given me that permission, just as He gave this permission to David. David was very honest in his prayer to God throughout the psalms. If we were perfect, we wouldn’t need God. It’s irrational to expect perfection from ourselves. That conveys a small view of God and an unrealistic big view of our own capabilities. 

God wants to see our messes. When we recognize our messes and surrender them before God, He will step in to see us through them.

— Janie Reed, USA Softball player

Janie Reed is a regular contributor to The Increase, providing articles and opinions. Check out Janie’s Increase profile here.

If you enjoyed this article, please share: